Voyage

Ahh computer....my Mayflower, my Millenium Falcon, my Star Ship Enterprise. I can do anything I want! I can troll people in chat rooms or on omegle, just to get a giggle. I can eat your brain and gain your knowledge. I can watch people kill each other or bang each other, depends on my mood. I can eat dog food. I can watch people give birth to monstrosities: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEeMJgV75nQ I can punch myself in the face. I can watch people wreck themselves in horribly painful ways. I can belly flop into a kiddy pool of thumb tacks.

Whatever the occasion, the internet makes it possible. It has allowed fat fucking slobs to have some kind of pretend life. It has made a ridiculous amount of people a ridiculous amount of money. It's awesome in every way.

Thanks Al Gore for your invention. Makes my day. Everyday.